


Bulls eye

by Hot_Sauce



Category: Bleach
Genre: Crack, Funny, Jokes, Light-Hearted, Memes, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-25
Updated: 2019-07-25
Packaged: 2020-07-19 22:44:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 785
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19981753
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hot_Sauce/pseuds/Hot_Sauce
Summary: This is just a short fic inspired by a vine, please enjoy!





	Bulls eye

It was just a simple night, everyone was hanging out a Urahara shop, enjoying snacks, music, and a few games of trivial things like darts, and pool. 

"No, I'm not kidding! My aim is perfect!" Rukia said, holding a handful of darts in one hand. 

"Oh yeah? Prove it then!" Renji said, grinning as he slapped his hand on the board, fingers spread out. "You miss my hand I'll give you 50 bucks on the spot, you hit my hand, you gotta pay me 50 bucks, deal?" Renji asked, figuring a little puncture wound would be worth some easy cash. 

Ichigo was currently eating some chips, but wandered over to the scene at the noise, actually everyone was crowding around to see the outcome. 

"You got a deal! Better get your wallet out," Rukia grinned, holding up her first dart. 

Ichigo crunched, not really seeing much of any good outcome coming out of this. If he were being honest, he kinda expected Rukia to miss the board entirely. 

And he was right. But also so very wrong. 

The dart soared from Rukia's hand, and hit Renji on the side of his forehead and immediately Ichigo began to choke after a rather violent inhale. 

And then Ichigo was laughing. He was laughing so damn _hard,_ the absolute unsurprised look on Renji's face with a fucking dart sticking out of his head was too much to not laugh at. He coughed desperately, trying to keep the chips in his mouth from spraying out but he wasn't able to breath at this point. 

"There's a dart in your head," He heard Chad said just as impassively as usual and Ichigo felt tears pricking his eyes. 

"It's in his head!" 

"Oh my god it's in his forehead!"

"Take it out!!"

He hunched over, one hand over his mouth and the other on his knee as he continued to just die laughing, unable to inhale beyond little sips of air before coughing/laughing more. 

"Take the dart out!! Don't just leave it in!!" Rukia shrieked, rushing over. 

" _Not to ruin your fun_ , _king, but you may want to consider breathing sometime soon, I'm getting dizzy,"_ Shiro said inside his head, as Ichigo took his hand off his knee to instead hunch over the counter. 

"Wow Ichigo, might wanna stop for some air," Urahara said, chuckling a bit as he went to fetch his first aid kit.

"You missed," Renji said, suddenly in the most disappointed tone and Ichigo actually felt _tears_ run down his cheeks, as his shoulders shook violently with his laughter and choking.

"I- I wasn't expecting the dart to be so light! I've never played before!" Rukia admitted while she tried to get him to bend down so she could remove his recent head accessory. 

"Ichigo are you alright?" Orihime asked, looking over at him with a bit of worry and confusion on her face. 

Ichigo just wheezed, coughing and trying to control his laughter, he was gonna black out at this rate. He lifted his head up off of the counter, choking up a lung as he hit the marble surface with his free hand while a tear rolled down his cheek. 

" _Dammit idiot, breathe!"_ Shiro said, evidently a bit anxious himself. 

He was more along the lines just coughing now, though he couldn't get the image of the dart just plunking right into Renji's head while he kept the most unamused expression out of his head. 

"Geeze, guess Renji's stupidity can bring out an entirely new side to people…" Uryu commented. 

"It's Rukia's fault!!" Renji shouted at him. 

His vision was spotting a bit, and he felt someone hand him a drink, so to avoid dying, he drank quickly before _finally_ being able to suck in some air before just busting out laughing again. 

"Glad to see you think this is funny!!" Renji snapped at him, while Urahara walked over and de-darted him. 

"Oh my God-" he wheezed, "holy shit that was the best thing I've ever _seen_!" Ichigo said, wheezing as he tried to control his laughter and breathe again. 

" _It really wasn't that funny,"_ Shiro said, sounding a little annoyed. 

" _You have no sense of humor,_ " Ichigo thought to him. 

" _Then perhaps you have too much of one, you almost passed out, dumbass,"_ Shiro said. 

" _I was choking,_ " Ichigo defended. 

" _My point still remains, you're ridiculous,_ " Shiro sighed. 

Ichigo chose not to respond, simply sipping his water and regaining control over his breathing pattern again while Renji got patched up and Rukia rambled out apologies. 

Renji did get his 50 bucks, but he stayed away from the dart board the remainder of the evening… 

  
  


Short fic inspired by here!: [ https://youtu.be/k_JqELA09Do ](https://youtu.be/k_JqELA09Do)

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> I regret not a single thing


End file.
